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Category Archives: Real Life

Girls’ night

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Last night Glenda and I had our girls’ night out at a pub on the other side of town. This venue looked like cougar country, but we’re neither in that class yet. I catch the eye of a young hunk, tanned so that his face is darker than his blonde hair. But I start to think I might have been too daring when he comes over to join us. I give him a little smile, and we introduce each other to him the way we always do with a guy. I get more interested when I see his earnest grey eyes, and the calm firm way his hands move. Steady hands are always a turn-on for me, and I’m just imagining how he might hold a girl.

He’s surprisingly well spoken for this neighbourhood, and for a guy who wears tattoos. We say the obvious about him being a stranger around here, and he says he’s over from Adelaide for the spring races. “Don’t talk to me about the races, after what I lost on the Melbourne Cup,” I exclaim. I’ve been told I’m attractive when I pretend to be a bit shitty, wonder if it’s true.

But Glenda is the one he has his eye on, even though she holds her hands in a position where he can’t help seeing the rings on her left. “My hubby is a trucker”, she drops into the conversation. Is that a warning, the guy must be wondering? “He’s off interstate at the moment,” she adds. Is that flirting? I nudge her under the table. Anyway, the three of us joke around.

While Rick (our new mate) is off at the bar, Glenda and I exchange a look that speaks volumes. I try to talk sense to her. “Some guys will never risk getting a single girl knocked up, figuring how much they could end up paying and for how long. But they won’t have that worry with another bloke’s wife. If she has a baby, who’s to say it isn’t her old man’s?”

“Big prize to win, nothing to lose”, Glenda says as the nearest poker machine boils over and splashes out its gold.

“Yeah, but I wonder if they see it that way. Is getting a kid such a big deal for most guys? Or do they just think married women are safer and easier?” I have the uneasy feeling that she’s ready to pay the jackpot – we only have these nights out when we’re both yearning for male company, then we end up guarding each other’s virtue.

When Rick returns we somehow get talking about threesomes. I want to see his reaction to an idea. “No, no, silly. Not one guy and two gals. I mean one woman, her husband and another guy.”

“Now, that’s evil,” he says. After all, I should remember he’s younger than me.

“But, Rick, wouldn’t the situation be really intense, emotionally, for both men?” He’s thinking, or just smiling to be polite. “Specially if they know the wife might have an egg waiting.”

He might be blushing, but we can’t tell. “God, he’d want to be careful. The other bloke, I mean,” is all he can say.

“Bet you’re always careful, Rick. I mean, you don’t have any kids back in Adelaide, do you?”

Now he’s laughing again, “No way, Honey! And don’t want any, either.” He discreetly slips the Trojan packet from his top pocket and shows it like the badge of a secret society.

“I guess I’d be safe, then,” Glenda murmurs.

She holds out her hand as she looks up at him, asking demurely, “Can I see that?” He’s only too eager to hand it over for inspection, but freezes when she savagely rips it in half and tosses the rubber away across the floor.

“It’s okay Rick,” she laughs at his stunned expression. “I want to go on to another place, can you give me a lift? And see me home, of course.”

“I’d be glad to, Ma’am,” he replies gallantly.

“Cos I still trust you’ll be careful. And that’s not a promise, it’s a dare,” she ends up almost whispering.

“Well, time for me to go. I gotta pick up my kids from Mum’s place and get home,” and then I’m standing up, leaving Glenda and Rick to decide what to do with the rest of the evening.

TTC Blinkies

That’s life

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It seems like every second cream brick-veneer in our neighbourhood houses a single-parent family. Single parent means a woman alone with kids. I don’t say single mothers, because as well as us unmarried mums there are divorced, separated, widowed ones and some who can’t quite figure out their marital status.

It’s a kids’ town, where life is ruled by the needs of our kids. Playgrounds, family entertainment and child health are the big topics of interest. School and kindy set the daily routine and the calendar, with each year marked by sports seasons, school breakup and christmas. A mum’s life revolves around shopping, cooking, laundry and getting children off to school.

And there’s romance – on the telly, in books, and maybe even in real life. You see, our only assets are ourselves and if we can make a good match, do a good deal, we sure will.

When I moved to this street, Alison took me under her wing and explained how we single parents survive. There’s a network of those mums who want to be part of it. The way she tells it, all the girls dream of meeting Mr Right. Maybe he’ll put a contact ad in the Sun, maybe friends will introduce you, maybe you just meet him in a shop. Mr Right being anyone with a steady job and no ties who you can get to make a commitment. The idea is that you please him so much that in his rosy cloud of arousal he takes to your family as well.

Only it never works out like that. You may find yourself doing the most outrageous things for that guy – and even enjoying them!

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I’ve got a new gravatar – I’m not trying to be rude by turning my back, but was just reminded that it mightn’t be safe to publish my face or anything that could identify my family. So for the public, I’m just a lady living somewhere in Australia. If you become my friend you might find out more.

Just now

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This is just my backyard Hills hoist (that’s an Australian clothesline), today. Usually it’s full of children’s things, with Mum’s hidden on the inside rows, but today was time to catch up with my own laundry before the rain starts. It’s spring here, though this picture doesn’t look it.

And it’s school holidays so I’ve got Sue home to help and kids playing outside to make the place lively.

Hello world!

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My kitchen window looks across an almost bare backyard where a plain fence divides my lawn and clothesline from a vacant paddock. Living almost in the country where I can see a few gumtrees and the distant blue hills is one consolation. Another is the newly made road that runs past my Housing Trust home and the eight other cream brick veneers in this street that ends nowhere.

Here I can tell the kids  “We’ve got a nice new house to live in, just the three of us, haven’t we?  It’s big, but not too much for Mummy to keep clean.  We’ve got nice neighbours to see every day if we want, but they’re not so close that everyone has to know each others’ business.” I’d feel less comfortable living close to my sister and parents, who’d want to know my business in detail.

After tea the empty skies darken, but the stars are often as bright as the street lamps.  In this neighbourhood, people lock their front doors early.  Nights are supposed to be quiet and private with blinds drawn over still-lit rooms or just the glow of a television.

The television, net and phone are my lifelines to the real world. I play The Sims 2 more than I should, it fits with the stories I make up. Yes, I’ve always loved telling stories, reading and imagining! I go shopping twice a week, getting a lift from a neighbour or walking with Paul in his pusher while Sue is at school. If I spend the morning shopping with Judy, Rae or Alison I like to make them lunch back at my place and we chat until it’s time for their kids to start arriving home.